Archive for March, 2010

Neighbours Recap 22 – 26 March 2010

March 27, 2010


For some reason Paul has two teenagers employed as his international organisation’s (Lassisters) strategists.

It worked in Big after all

Except in Big Tom Hanks works designing toys, which a child might understand.

Declan comes up with an idea for Lassiters to hold an annual Neighbours Day, to show off Lassiters in all its glory. This is somehow meant to attract clients to the hotel, the logic of which will be considered later in this recap. Through some contrived sequence of events, Ellen is able to steal Declan’s idea and present it to Paul as his own. Paul assigns Declan a support role to Ellen’s initiative.

Ellen hilariously requests his subordinate, Declan, do menial tasks such as laundry. This seems an appropriate task given his lack of work experience or tangible skills. Declan, with a healthy sense of entitlement, decides to prank Ellen by mixing colours with whites.

More importantly, Declan buttons up his suit, which is something I hate.

It’s the kind of thing someone does the first time they ever wear a suit thinking it looks sharp. It doesn’t, you just look like someone who doesn’t normally wear suits.

Anyway, Declan and Ellen continue to tiff so the Robinson clan have a family meeting. For some reason Declan decides he’ll move out all the way across the street, thus resolving the issue.

Summer has set Harry up with a girl named Renae, who seems oblivious to the fact that Harry lacks any traits; character or otherwise. The writers jam a few scenes of Harry wanting Summer and not Renae down the viewer’s eyes and ears. It’s all very subtle.

Renae is playing drums

And very creative.

Plus they keep mentioning Guitar Hero. Does anyone still play that game? I declare Guitar Hero a fad.

Later Harry realises he has to tell Renae he isn’t that keen on her. He asks Plain Jane, who in turn asks Zeke and Donna. Zeke arrives:

Vest and coiffed hair.

Unfotunately he can’t offer Harry much advice. He does offer Harry a shoulder to cry on in the hope of scoring on the rebound. Harry and Renae meet and Renae breaks up with Harry.


Paul and Ellen are dicussing the budgeting and logistics of Neighours Day, when it becomes clear Ellen hasn’t included overtime wages in the budget. This is the second time the writers have mentioned budgeting overtime wages. Perhaps Fremantle Media has jewed them in the past. Fingers crossed at least.

There is general planning for Neighbours Day, which is pretty boring. Andrew is apparently a manager of the hotel now as he assigns generic nerd girl to front desk despite her inexperience.

Glasses AND a ponytail. The classic nerd wardrobe.

A client of the hotel is angry at Nerd Girl’s incompentence and Summer sticks up for Nerd Girl. Summer goes on and on about it to Ellen who eventually decides to send that client an email terminating their relationship. Alright, so here is the stupid part. He sends it to all of their clients accidentally. Fuck knows how or why.


Neighbours Day has finally arrived. Paul seems to have some bizarre misconception of the types of clients this event will attract. He wants “VIP” clients who will spend money at his hotel. For some reason he decides to attract them with a carnival for children.

Target market

Paul eventually finds out about the email Ellen sent. He wonders how this could’ve fucked up. I’d begin with not hiring teenagers in presumably senior positions.


Lucas and Toady bury the hatchet and become friends once more. As Libby notes, neither of them have any male friends besides each other. I’m pretty sure Toady says Steph is basically a male. Either way, it’s a depressing state of affairs for both of them, so they reconcile.

They go and have beers at Charlie’s all afternon and play pool, only Lucas isn’t having beer but rather shandy. Turns out Lucas is trying to get Toady drunk so he can take advantage of him. He gets him back to Toady’s, as Lucas lives with Paul so can’t bring his booty back there.

get that shirt off

Just as Lucas puts on his moves, which he perfected during his trial runs with Steph, Toady falls asleep. But this is Neighbours, a show entirely reliant on shithouse plot devices, so Toady talks in his sleep.

Not only does he talk but he says “I love……” silence “I love…. Sonya” the retardness and laziness of which I will leave you to ponder. Ironically because I’m to lazy to make a joke about it.

Also, did anyone else call fat kids at school “Sonya” as in “Tits-on-ya?”

Right…. Moving on.


Friday is usually a bumper episode and this one doesn’t disappoint. Well it does, except for one massively awesome thing.

LYN IS LEAVING. But before I get your hopes up, it seems she will be coming back at some point. She is leaving to see Oscar in an effort to bring Oscar back. On the plus side we will have Oscar and his physical likeness to a down sydrome child, but we will also have Lyn back which sucks.

Also, Dinnerdog has requested I bring this to our reader’s attention:

The teens have a pantomime party as they read Donna’s Mum’s diary, trying to work out who Donna’s Dad is. But before they get a chance, the candles they were using whilst participating in Earth Hour inadvertantly burns the diary.


So is lighting heaps of candles really that much better for the environment than using an electric light?