Archive for February, 2011

Neighbours Recap 14th – 18th February 2011

February 23, 2011


Declan wanders into Charlie’s where he finds Zeke

Neighbours and rather intimately rubs his shoulder to let him know he’s arrived for their date.

This scene could potentially be the biggest stretch of both Zeke and Declan’s acting careers.  Firstly, to establish the manliness of the discussion Zeke orders two beers.  Then they need to establish their mateship, so they repeat the word “dude,” except neither Declan nor Zeke can keep up this macho charade.

Declan – “I can’t help you unless you spit it out”

Zeke – “There’s a girl and she’s got a crush on me.”

Declan – “Dude, hello, ask her out.”

Zeke – “Dude, hello, it’s Sophie.”

Relieved, Declan laughs.

Neighbours Phew!  Sophie is no match for me.

Jade continues to wear sports bras everywhere.

Neighbours It was either this screen cap or the one when she is leaving which is a good shot of her short shorts.  Anyway, just so you know.

Last week the thugs trashed Elle’s garage and this week they trashed Kate’s home.  I like how these thugs are trying to get Lucas but can’t actually trash any of his stuff because he simply has nothing.

Neighbours He probably smells too.

On closer inspection he certainly does.


The thugs also refuse to steal anything, despite them believing Lucas owes them money.

Zeke seeks advice from pretty much everyone on the street about to let Sophie down gently.  Toady tells him to completely change his persona to something Sophie wouldn’t find attractive. 

 Neighbours This is what they come up with.

A simple Matthew Werkmeister google image search reveals what they should’ve done.


Ok, I might’ve been a bit liberal when I suggested that Jade is wearing her sports bra everywhere.

Neighbours It just seems to be the General Store.

Why don’t these guys steal Lucas’ fucking fancy ute.

NeighboursAfter all, they apparently steal cars for a living.

Sideburn watch:

Neighbours Even more wispy than ever before

Zeke tells Sophie he isn’t interested in her.


Distraught, Sophie finds the only medium she has had to convey her love.

Neighbours Her diary

She scribbles out all the written emotion she had pent up 4 EVA, apparently.

Neighbours Is that sudoku?  That’s odd.

Naturally Kate suggests chocolate and ice-cream to help Sophie wallow in her self-pity.  Jade isn’t at the General Store, instead she is exercising.

Neighbours Better cover up.  If that’s covering up.

In that same scene, Kate basically calls Zeke a fucking idiot for not being able to handle the situation with Sophie.  I’m pretty sure she calls him pathetic.

Neighbours He pulls this ugmo face in response.

Having eaten some chocolate cake to console herself, Sophie looks to Jade to provide other tired clichés.  What could a character possibly want to do when he or she is frustrated?  Punch a fucking punching bag. 

Neighbours Now that’s a merchandising opportunity.

Lucas sits at the bar by himself. Again

Neighbours Believe it or not, he isn’t actually picking his snout.


If the above GIF files doesn’t work, just click on the picture to see the magic.

Then this bird walks in.


Followed by the only possible reaction.

Neighbours Sleaze face.

That girl is Underpants’ new partner to infiltrate the illegal street racing syndicate in that there here town.


The men and women of Ramsey St are in direct competition to see who can raise the most money, the winner gains the rights to the Men’s Shed.  I’m not sure what the women will be giving up if they lose, but that’s not important. 

Like any competition, both sides employ underhanded tactics to get the edge.  As a dedicated Neighbours correspondent, the women’s team decided to leak some of the men’s photos.  I’m like the Julian Assange of the Neighbours world, except more topical.  By topical, I obviously mean “tropical.”



The men retaliated by providing some stolen snaps of the women. 

Neighbours Let’s be honest.  The girls are ugly, so they got creative and drew attention to their best assets.  Shoes and bones apparently.


Tash and Andrew tell Michael that his daughter is pregnant.  Because Michael is male, he has no choice but to respond to any difficult situation with turbo outrage.

Neighbours Yes, it really is eye-rollingly annoying.

Holy shit balls, Batman.  So Susan, Lyn and Sonya sit around the coffee shop discussing what they’ll wear in their photo shoot.  Sonya reveals she’ll do “something tropical.”  I swear I wrote those other jokes before watching Thursday’s episode, but now I’ve written this paragraph I’m sure no one else cares.

Neighbours But Lyn is cross-eyed in this photo so it’s worth keeping.


A long bow indeed.

In an effort to gee Karl up, Susan practices some poses.

Neighbours Is that a tropical dance I see?

Actually the whole calendar storyline has included some pretty classic dialogue, which all culminates in this.

Neighbours The PG rating has made the writers go bananas.

Susan continues her effort to get Karl all riled up, she even teases him with one of her outfits from the blue box.


Karl realises he doesn’t love Susan, he really just loves the feel of latex on his bare naked skin.



So Andrew explains to Michael that he is going to stick around and support the baby.  He plans to finish school and work at Lassiters, which Michael questions “with a baby?”  Apparently he hasn’t met the son of the woman he is currently sleeping with (Andrew’s step-mum).

Michael, Andrew and Summer convince Tash to see a doctor and get blood tests to confirm the pregnancy.  She sees Dr Doug and to keep the pregnancy charade going she offers him sexual favours on the side.

Neighbours  How could he refuse?

Also, slapstick Neighbours is in full swing.  Devil-spawn has a new pet Lizard and it immediately goes missing in Toady’s house. 

Neighbours Every kid should have a pet blue-tongue lizard at some stage.